Spending time with the birthday boy or girl
When someone makes the choice not to celebrate his birthday, they make the choice not to make a big deal about it. This can be for a variety of reasons which are not to be discussed, but may confuse those who want a special party to celebrate the day. As noted above, the simple act of spending time with someone who can more than compensate.
Take, for example, someone who likes to play games on light wines. If you want to give them a happy birthday, you could do worse than call a few days before and propose a night of board game. If they agree, see the collection of some of his closest friends to join, but they know how to keep the birthday wishes for a word or two and perhaps a gift or card.
Conversations and greetings
What happens, however, if they do not want to answer an evening activity? Is there a dish you want to offer them a meal? Then call them on their birthday and say. Discuss what you want and at the end of the conversation to say "Goodbye and happy birthday." Again, keep the focus off of the special day, as requested, while recognizing that.
Because someone's birthday only comes once a year, so why would you ignore it? So if you know they do not want to celebrate his birthday just let go. Fun stuff you probably matters more than whether or not to sing happy birthday.
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